states
June 7, 2011
states of mind which make myself burn into agony and anger. Despise is all what is left regards her.
nicknames, last conversations, last words which have stuck into my head and make me literally sick.
attitude is what i could not and still can not stand and understand. how can she feel so free, so mind blowing selfish at one stage of her life? of course it will go away for her and me. eventually. but for now i still feel this agony.
it comes out like a spontaneous sigh from lungs deep inside when diaphragm squeezes an pushes out the air. that is something i have not felt before, but not certain yet whether to be thankful for that in future.
this is a disappointment for me in her which comes out with this sigh and i hope with every cough i will make this person go away.